A NOTE TO MYSELF

myselfA Note to myself:

I have ignored you and I am sorry.

I wouldn’t treat a friend that way.

You are beautiful.

I am proud of your strength.

You have come a long way.

Hold your head up high.

Together we can do anything.

I love you self.

 

Advertisements

LONLINESS IS REAL

How is it possible? This lonliness? Youre not real! I gave to my family, gave to my friends but you snuck in the door “lonliness”,  youre not real!

Who are you and who am I?  Speak to me lonliness. You invited yourself in and yet you dont speak. Show your ugly face lonliness. Youre not real!

You are a coward lonliness. You hide in my shadows and dine on me. Your silent laughter sucks my soul and calls me to a place of not. You are a black hole in my mind with no return. Youre not real!

Show yourself so I can fight you lonliness. You lead me down the dark path of doubt but youre not real!

Others see my surfaced light and see only strength. I dare not whisper help for fear they will see my weakness. Lonliness are you real?

My eyes well up with tears of lonliness. Is that you speaking? Are you real?

You blanket me with sadness and I feel you lonliness. That is you isnt it? You are REAL!

I dont like your taste lonliness. You are REAL!

I see your ugly face. You are REAL!

“HELP ME’, I yell,

LONLINESS IS REAL!

 

 

What If…….

What if, is an infinite question asked with no answer. It floats in our minds when faced with decision.

What if I…….

What if you……

There is no name to that road. No past, no future, just the empty unwritten canvas. I didn’t hear your cries.

What if……

I had heard your cry for help? Would it have changed history?

What if…..

I had called? Would you have confided? Would you be here today?

What if…..

is all I have yesterday, today and tomorrow? It haunts my thoughts, hoping to hold on to time for one more second, one more moment, one more hour, one more day to reach for you, talk with you, see you.

What if……

My sweet friend, you came back and stopped these tears? Come back.

What if……

FORGIVENESS CHALLENGE

Our world needs this forgiveness challenge.

Do you know what I think?

I think before anyone can progress they must forgive themselves.

It is the answer to all.

If we forgive ourselves the world will be easy to heal.

For if we fill nothing but LOVE inside our own souls what else is there to share to the world but LOVE?

GO TO: http://forgivenesschallenge.com/

Join me.

Tamara

GOOD OR EVIL?

 

Good-vs-Evil_11A friend once told me, “if you want to know what’s really going on in the world, go to the movies”.

Our recent run of new releases and up and coming releases are following the same futuristic view,

sometimes using aliens in the place of government, turning good against evil:   Red Dawn, World War Z,  

Battle Las Angeles, I am Legend,  The Invasion, Red Dawn, Hunger Games, Elysium,  X-Men, Divergent,

Jupiter Rising,  Oblivion,  etc. Is it the powers that be lifting us to a higher frequency or the government

conditioning us for the hunger of blood.? With such a plethora of films all conveying this

 common thread of civilian unrest, it really makes you wonder what’s in the undercurrent. This concept

is now appearing in the woodwork of real life.  The forcing of Obama care, The patriot act. The Bundy

saga over land wars,  etc. A rebellion is eminent but is it for Good or for Evil? To be continued……

By

Tamara B

MY PERSONAL STORY: A SPOKEN FAREWELL.

An unspoken, kept in a closet, subject so many women don’t speak. I am speaking it so I can heal.

Embrace this blog with grace. (CLICK ON THE YOU-TUBE LINK)

 

There comes a time in a woman’s life when no matter how much we try and deny it, age has a affect on our lives. This reality can come in small packages like a first deep wrinkle or huge awakenings for an long overdue DR visit. In any case, it will come. The undeniable fact wont let you pass by it, no matter how in control or prepared one believes they are .

For me, saying goodbye to a life long friend is my reality. She served me well. For 9 months she held and nurtured each of my precious children. Together we wrapped, fed and watched over them as they grew. So many times she even protected them for me. She grafted the bond between a mother an a child, holding us close as she fed life’s blood into their souls. She warned me ahead of time if I refused to rest, grounding me until danger had lifted. When her work was almost complete she talked with me, quieted my mind, opened a clearer channel to Gods listening ear, letting me know, time was drawing near. A door was opened and she let go. The cords were cut as she said goodbye, quieting herself, allowing me to comfort her. There were times we struggled to save the weakest gifts but it was not meant to be. She talked with God and together they decided. I fought and cried but she stood her ground. She released them back into his waiting arms, letting me know we were OK.

…….and now…….

She raised her voice one last time, letting me know she is tired and her work is complete. Hers is not a quiet voice. I have no choice. The clearer channel to Gods listening ear is open again. I fought and cried, prayed and pleaded but he stands his ground.
He is quieting my mind telling me its time to say goodbye. Its my turn to release her back into his waiting arms. There are no word but a quiet memory of our time together. Thank you my old friend.

One last walk you and I take. I am meeting God at the gates. What will I see? What will we say? Will I let go?

                                                                                                       

                          FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND

One night a woman had a dream. She dreamed she was walking along the beach with the LORD. Across the sky flashed scenes from her life. For each scene she noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonging to her and the other to the LORD.

When the last scene of her life flashed before her, she looked back at the footprints in the sand. She noticed that many times along the path of her life there was only one set of footprints. She also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times of her life.

This really bothered her and she questioned the LORD about it. LORD you said that once I decided to follow you, you’d walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why when I needed you most you would leave me.

The LORD replied, my precious, precious child, I Love you and I would never leave you! During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.